Hello sweetheart, 

We found out today that all our checks and references were good and we are moving to stage two of the adoption process. A step closer to you. 

I was so excited when I saw that email. We have been waiting for you for so long. 

Tonight though I feel a little scared. I suppose uncertainty does that to people. I’m not scared about you, not at all. I know you will be amazing and that you will steal my heart when I meet you. 

I am scared that I won’t be as good as you deserve. I’m scared that maybe I won’t be as good at motherhood as I hope to be. 

I will have everything I’ve ever wanted but I’m terrified I won’t be enough. 

I can promise you though that I will always do my best for you. Always. Because you are worth it a million times over. 

I wonder if you are born yet, perhaps only just or perhaps you are a few years old already. A little fighter I bet. 

I hope you are safe. I love you very much. 

Mummy x